in addition to stinging, streaky sunburns on the backs of both legs, a result of sticking my ass in the air while riding down the dan river near danbury, nc with the support of one of a big-rig’s 18 inner tubes, i have a new favorite turd euphamism: “stink pickle”.
we had the honor to be behind a giant country family, i didn’t pick up their town of origin, but we were in danbury, near lynchum road up by hanging rock (there apparently is not a lynchum road, i don’t actually know what the name of the road was, but for your reference, and to defend some of o’s discomfort, here is a google search of every business with “lynch” in the name in or near danbury). anyway, this was a country family with some country accents who ate apples, but only ate the meat and we found at least 2 apple skins floating in the water behind them. but they were having a good time, drinking all the beers, talking about middle-aged-titty-flashing and then one of the kids really took it home: “i am not gonna leave a stink pickle!”. with his accent, it sounded more like “i ain’t gon’ leave a stainq peekle!”. …well.
on a side note, one of our companions actually did leave a stink pickle somewhere along the banks (or in the depths) of the dan river near danbury, nc. on a positive note, it was not the one of our companions with whom i share a bed. for the sake of friendship, i will not reveal the perp’s identity.